Cute?!? I Think Not!by Buzhwa
submitted to sb-online.net sometime in 2002
It royally irks me when I hear from Spongebob "fans" that only rave about how cute, hot, or sexy he is. HE IS A SPONGE. If these people actually watched the show religiously, they would know from the episode Pressure that Spongebob reproduces by budding. (You would also know that if you have taken an introductory biology class.) =) Liking Spongebob isn't something you should do just because it's "in" or "cool" - you should enjoy watching the show and appreciate it for its awesome-ness. You don't have to have seen every single episode, but it helps you increase your knowledge of the show and know what others are talking about when they make jokes or references to certain things like *dolphin sound*, POOP, or EVIL.
Of course, I do think that some of Spongebob's characteristics are cute, like the facial expressions that he makes, but I also like the program for its great humor, insults, artwork, and much more. Also, I would never make the statement "I love Spongebob" without knowing my stuff about the show. In conclusion, please do me a favor and don't tell me Spongebob is cute without also being able to tell me the answer to "Squidward, should I use Mr. Cleanser or Dr. Clean?" Thanks for taking the time to read this.